will this ever go away

Man, I have such rollerskating emotions: one day I want to kill her, choking her around the neck until she dies, and the next I want to tell her I love her and cannot live without her. I absolutely have no interaction with her, so all of these emotions I am generating. I don't think she has a clue how much I obsess. We dated for a month and a half, stopped for three months, then started to date again for a month and went to relationship consulting. I broke up with her as the fag consular started to cry, what a douche bag him and his boyfriend and their Vietnamese kids were. Actually, I never met the kids, I just saw their picture as I described my childhood. "It's all your parent's fault," was all that queer could say. Stupid jerks tried to send me to collections for not paying my bill. I used the free debt collection act article blah blah blah to get out of it. God, I love her man, fuck I want to kill her. It's Christmas Eve and the worshipable Sun is out. Love is in the air, and I am getting pimple under my right nostril; im sure it's this fucking lexapro.